What does it mean to you to mean something to someone else? Is it enough for them to tell you that you matter, or do you need them to show you? Would you rather have words without feeling or feeling without words? At some point we stop believing words because the actions of others never show them to be true. Someone will tell you they love you one minute and start flirting with a random person the next. Is that love? I don't think so... If someone matters that much to you, you make it a point to never hurt them even if they aren't around to know about it. Because the idea of hurting them should hurt you too. If that's not the case I'd say that person definitely deserves better than you. Don't we all deserve that?
I'm rambling now... But really I'm trying to figure it all out now. I've never felt like I was worth very much only because others have made me feel that way, perhaps not intentionally but actions always outweigh words...always. I know better though, I know who I am and I know what I have to offer, and most importantly I know what I deserve. But that doesn't necessarily mean I'll ever find it. I can only hope that someone can be as good to me as I am to them. I can only hope that I will matter half as much as they matter to me. But most importantly... I hope that I can matter enough to myself to never allow someone to make me feel meaningless ever again.
